Hello all! Much to the chagrin of many, I have not disappeared off the planet. Heh heh! It's been one very busy year… Musikfest in Bethlehem, PA… the X-Games in Philadelphia… Singer/Songwriter weekend of concerts in Philly… whew! I even found time to golf a little during some of the heat-infused months. Due to my overload of outdoor fun, my writing sort of took its own vacation. You haven't missed me too much, have you?
Ed, it was nice talking to you the week after your strokes. Rest in peace.
With that said, I want to see how many of you are believers in the pseudo-science known as prognostication. Y'know…like Nostradamus. He was a guesser of the future who got one or two of his hundreds of guesses right. Because of that, so many people through the ages think he was some kind of prophet. Sure he was. So am I. Ready? Okay: hummmmmmmm… hummmmmmmm… I say that tomorrow morning, the sun will come up, and possibly be blocked by clouds. Wow. Pretty good, huh? Of course, you won't know how good until tomorrow morning.
In the meantime, I did find myself noticing that there are several song lyrics that could, if you're the Nostradamus type, be prophetic in relation to disc golf. Come with me on a journey of amazing findings and frightful possibilities!
"Born of frustration" ---James
This is self explanatory. My game. Sometimes your game. Oh well, there's always tomorrow to break out of the frustration funk. Could this be the disc golf theme song?
"It's just a permanent reminder of a temporary feeling" ---Jimmy Buffett
Ever have one of those days on the course when nothing goes right, not even your turnover discs? Yikes. So you've missed 3 putts from within 6 feet, you lost your favorite disc in the pond, you forgot to pick up your mini from 4 holes ago, and now you've just driven your brand new driver into the first tree off the tee. That's it! You are so frustrated, that you just let go and kick the bejeesus out of your golf bag.
As the bag reaches the zenith of its flight, and two or three discs have begun flying out of the bag, someone just happens to take a picture of you. Nice. Now you'll always have that permanent reminder of a temporary feeling. A nice reminder of how much of a loser you look like when you kick your bag out of frustration. Excellent!
"If you take a walk I'll tax your feet" ---the Beatles
So the big push is for MORE SPONSORS! MORE SPONSORS! MORE SPONSORS! for disc golf tournaments. With more sponsors, the hope is that the payouts will become bigger, and thus attract higher caliber talent, and maybe give some credibility to our sport. Of course, more money means more visibility to the IRS. And since tournament results (including winning dollar amounts) are printed on a regular basis, this would mean that the IRS can easily find out how much money the pros are winning at big tournaments. Disc golf involves walking, so get ready all of you pro cash winners to have your feet taxed! And don't forget to provide your winning amounts to the government every April 15th. I wonder, though, how does the IRS plan on taxing the minis I seem to win at every tournament I play in??
"If you think too hard you'll blow yourself in two" ---the dBs
Most of time, this game requires much less thought than we think. Have you ever thought too much about a shot, only to have the shot completely bomb? It usually costs you a shot too, eh? Maybe this lyric should be "if you think too hard, you'll blow yourself a 2".
"Stroke me, stroke me" ---Billy Squire
With any luck, the PDGA rules will be enforced to penalize the players who continually foot fault on drives, fall forward on putts, etc. In the PGA, the players have the integrity to call rules infractions on themselves. Hey boys and girls, we're better and cooler than the PGA. Let's prove it. Take the strokes when you break the rules. Do not pass go and do not collect two hundred dollars. It is only a game, after all.
"What goes up, must come down" ---Blood, Sweat & Tears
Okay okay…this one definitely does not always end up the way you'd like. Some discs do not come down without the help of a thrown waterbottle, stick, other disc (don't forget to take your penalty strokes for throwing a disc to get your disc down!).
And as many of us know, some just do not come down at all.
"What was I thinking when I let go of you" ---Wilco
Eagle, my Eagle. Why oh why did you fly into that tree? Why oh why did I hold onto you for so long? What oh what was I thinking when I let go of you?
"I couldn't drink enough to make this make sense,
but I think I'm gonna give it a try" -Old 97s
I don't have any prophecy idea for you on this one. I just think it's a great line, and definitely could apply to many kinds of disc golf situations.
"I…I live on a chain" -Pete Yorn
However, I wish the prophetic line could be changed to "I…I live in the chains". That would certainly prove to be better for my game. Living on the chains usually means hitting too far right or left, and the disc then living under the basket.
I know there have to be hundreds more. Will you let me know? I'll do a follow-up with your suggestions in a few weeks. Born of frustration, indeed.
I hope all of your golf is fun golf! Drop me a line.
Send feedback to Joe THE.
Bogstradomus
